20 Best Futurama Quotes (That Are Still Hilarious Today)


Summary

  • Futurama’s iconic quotes remain hilarious, showcasing the show’s comedic brilliance and humorous take on sci-fi tropes.
  • The characters’ unique personalities and quirks contribute to the show’s humor, from Bender’s selfishness to Zoidberg’s terrible doctoring skills.
  • The show cleverly incorporates pop culture references, like Emperor Lrrr’s nod to Friends, adding an extra layer of humor to the quotes.

Futurama is one of the most iconic adult animated sitcoms of all time, and these 20 quotes from the long-running sci-fi series are still absolutely hilarious. While Futurama is full of high-concept sci-fi storylines, great characters, and incredibly creative worldbuilding, the series is still most well-known for its comedy, with many of Futurama‘s jokes requiring a science degree to understand. While each episode of Futurama contains a plethora of jokes, only some lines have managed to stand the tests of time and remain hilarious to this day. So, here are 20 Futurama quotes that are still hilarious today.

Futurama is finally back, with Hulu reviving the beloved Matt Groening sitcom for another season more than 10 years after the show went off the air. Season 11 has managed to maintain the same quality, heart, and cleverness from the original seasons, with the newest batch of episodes containing some jokes that rival the early seasons. However, some of the jokes from Futurama‘s first 10 seasons have managed to stay funny decades after they were first written, and that’s what this list is here to celebrate. These 20 iconic Futurama lines have managed to transcend the episodes they were in and remain funny even out of context.

Bender Bending Rodríguez Gets Embarassed

“I’m So Embarrassed. I Wish Everybody Else Was Dead.”

Futurama Bender

Bender is selfish, so it’s natural for him to say something to the effect of wishing “everybody else was dead.” In fact, his selfishness is part of the reason Bender is arguably the best TV robot, which sounds like something he would say about himself.

In one particular situation where he says this, even though he’s the one who has done something embarrassing, it’s everyone else who should be dead so they don’t have to see him. As if he knows that he does so many senseless things, the general public should just stop looking at him. He shouldn’t have to clean up his act for anyone else, after all.

Philip J. Fry On Valentine’s Day

“Valentine’s Day Is Coming? Oh Crap – I Forgot To Get A Girlfriend Again.”

Futurama Fry

Despite his on-again, off-again relationship with Leela, Fry is not really successful with the ladies. He’s not really what anyone would call a catch, or smooth, at all. He can be quite funny and not often in an endearing way, as he’s a mostly average person with below-average skills.

Fans can use his excuse about forgetting to “get a girlfriend” for themselves the next time Valentine’s Day comes around and they’re still single, but they shouldn’t expect the statement to make them feel any better (Fry certainly didn’t.)

Dr. John A. Zoidberg Is A Terrible Doctor

“Fry, It’s Been Years Since Medical School, So Remind Me. Disemboweling In Your Species: Fatal Or Non-Fatal?”

Futurama's Zoidberg with a shocked expression.

Dr. Zoidberg is not the first person anyone would trust to be operating on them, especially if he has to ask if disemboweling someone will kill them. In fact, now fans may be left wondering what species exists in this world that could survive being disemboweled, but that’s one of the main reasons why his character is so funny.

He just scares everyone and acts like a wacky character, but somehow he’s a doctor. Those contradictions are part of what makes the show so strange in the best and often funniest way possible.

Turanga Leela Knows When To Quit

“Well, You Obviously Won’t Listen To Reason. So, I Guess I’ll Listen To Idiotic-Ness And Come With You.”

Futurama's Leela steering the Planet Express ship.

Leela’s quote about her crewmates not being able to “listen to reason” emphasizes the fact that she must be so frustrated being constantly surrounded by dim-witted friends. While it is hilarious, this Leela quote is also pretty representative of her personality.

She’s the person who will try to talk someone out of doing something really reckless, but if they insist on doing it anyway, she’ll go with them to make sure they stay safe. While she may stick around to rub it in and remind them that she told them so, they can always depend on her to do it again.

Related: Futurama Cast Guide: Who Voices The Planet Express Crew Across All 11 Seasons

Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth Is Always Handing Out Dangerous Missions

“Now, Now. There Will Be Plenty Of Time To Discuss Your Objections When And If You Return.”

Professor Farnsworth smiling from ear to ear as he drives in Futurama.

Professor Farnsworth isn’t really known for taking peoples’ feelings, emotions, or even lives into consideration, especially when it comes to his experiments or his job. He’s focused on getting things from point A to point B and doesn’t really seem fazed when his staff’s lives are in danger, but that’s just who he is.

His dismissive attitude towards the safety of the crew is at best, hilarious, and at worst, slightly disturbing. It’s one of the things that makes him so fascinating as a character, though, and most fans would agree that they wouldn’t change a thing.

Emperor Lrrr References A Classic Sitcom

“Why Does Ross, The Largest Friend, Not Simply Eat The Other Five?”

Emperor Lrrr is one of Futurama‘s most well-known villains, and although he is vicious, he has some pretty great lines. While watching Earth programs with his wife Ndnd, Lrrr explains that the show makes no sense, with him asking “Why does Ross, the largest friend, not simply eat the other five?” This is clearly referencing the beloved sitcom Friends, which is funny enough. However, the line manages to perfectly reflect the personalities of the Omicronians, with it being one of the prime examples of how Futurama should handle pop culture references, making it one of the show’s funniest quotes.

Amy Kroker (née Wong) Knows Quality When She Sees It

“Finally, A Uniform I’d Be Happy To Be Caught Dead In!”

Futurama's Amy in a pink sweatshirt.

A funny quote about a stylish uniform is brought to fans by Amy Wong, who is a Futurama character who deserves her own spin-off. It’s her hilarious one-liners like these that make her such a lovable character.

Most people have said, “I wouldn’t be caught dead in that outfit” at least once or twice in their life, but no one ever really says the opposite. Given the workplace hazards of Amy’s job, it’s understandable that she would utter this phrase at some point or another. Is it too much to ask for a good outfit in space?

Hermes Conrad Knows How To Cover His Tracks

“If You Ask Me, It’s Mighty Suspicious. I’m Gonna Call The Police. Right After I Flush Some Things.”

Hermes Conrad sitting down and wearing a suit in Futurama.

It’s pretty well known that Hermes enjoys his marijuana – that’s one of many of the running jokes with his character. Everyone knows that he enjoys this habit, but he’s constantly trying to hide it in a hilariously obvious way. His quote about having to “flush some things” emphasizes that.

Hermes has a lot of really funny signature catchphrases, like adding “sweet” before an animal or object, but he always manages to say some pretty hilarious one-liners as well. Especially when it comes to hiding his marijuana habits.

Related: Futurama Season 11 Episodes Ranked (So Far)

Captain Zapp Brannigan Is Never The Hero People Want To See

“I Got Your Distress Call And Came Here As Soon As I Wanted To.”

Futurama Zapp Brannigan

Zapp Brannigan isn’t exactly a likable character, as he doesn’t really care about anyone else. It’s his selfishness that makes him funny and he is aptly often portrayed as an arrogant and egoistic character.

The fact that he would come and help someone in an emergency situation only when he feels like doing so indicates he doesn’t actually care about that particular person’s situation. He just likes the idea of being a hero when it’s convenient for him. It’s also pretty funny that he doesn’t even care enough to worry about admitting this.

Dr. Zoidberg Finally Reveals His Doctoral Training

“My Doctorate Is In Art History”

Throughout Futurama, Dr. Zoidberg’s entire schtick is that he is an awful doctor, with him really not knowing anything about anatomy or biology. However, in season 7’s “The Duh-Vinci Code,” Zoidberg gives a shocking accurate summary of how artists have painted over other paintings in the past. Farnsworth asks how Zoidberg knows this, and Zoidberg replies “My doctorate is in art history.” This is not only a hilarious joke, but it is actually the key to understanding every other detail surrounding Zoidberg. Although the Zoidberg line is fairly subtle, it is one of the funniest quotes from Futurama‘s original run.

Zapp Explains His Awful Military Strategy

“You See, Killbots Have A Preset Kill Limit. Knowing Their Weakness, I Sent Wave After Wave Of My Own Men At Them Until They Reached Their Limit And Shut Down.”

Into the wild green yonder futurama zapp brannigan

Zapp Brannigan is an unforgivably bad military commander, with his combat strategies almost never working. However, his attempt to take down the Killbots in Futurama features one of his worst yet funniest strategies yet. According to Zapp, the Killbots have a preset kill limit, meaning that they will shut down after killing enough people. Thus, Zapp decided to send a horde of his own DOOP soldiers into battle only for them to die, leading to the Killbots shutting down. This strategy surprisingly seemed to work, but the idea of Zapp knowingly sacrificing his own soldiers and exclaiming it with such confidence is hilariously dark.

“You Can’t Just Have Your Characters Announce How They Feel! That Makes Me Feel Angry!”

Futurama Robot Devil With Hellraiser Puzzle Box

The original Futurama finale, season 4’s “The Devil’s Hands Are Idle Playthings,” is a pretty emotional conclusion to the series. However, it also contains the show’s funniest and most meta line. In the episode, Fry is writing an opera with the Robot Devil. The Robot Devil, displeased with Fry’s lyricism, comments on his lack of subtlety by saying “You can’t just have your characters announce how they feel! That makes me feel angry!” This hilarious joke explains one of the rules of character writing and instantly breaks it, and while it may go over the heads of some viewers, it is absolutely hilarious even out of context.

Philip J. Fry Has Interesting Tastes

“Did Everything Just Taste Purple For A Second?”

Futurama's Fry doing the star trek hand gesture.

The Fry quote about tasting like purple is hilarious because it simply doesn’t make any sense. How does anything taste like a color? What could the color purple possibly taste like? Fans could associate it with grape, but it’s clear that he means that color specifically.

Of course, Fry’s character is hilarious because some of the things he says are so strange that they just don’t make any sense, which could also be because he’s not exactly the smartest person. It may frustrate his coworkers – especially Leela – but it sure makes the audience laugh.

Bender Bending Rodríguez Is A Proud Robot

“My Story Is A Lot Like Yours, Only More Interesting ‘Cause It Involves Robots.”

Futurama Bender 2

If fans ask Bender, any story that involves robots is probably going to be more awesome simply because robots are awesome. It’s Bender’s style to be straight-up rude to people and shut them down for his own enjoyment.

To be honest, a story about Bender, in general, is probably interesting simply because of the shenanigans he gets himself into, even if they do sometimes put others in harm’s way. It’s clear from his personality that he doesn’t really care once he has booze in one hand and a cigar in the other.

Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth Puts His Health First

“Everyone, I Have A Very Dramatic Announcement, So Anyone With A Weak Heart Should Leave Now. Goodbye.”

Professor Farnsworth raising his hand and pointing in Futurama.

Professor Farnsworth sometimes comes in with a different version of his catchphrase “good news, everyone,” with a memorable one being his quote about having “a very dramatic announcement.” He warns the crew that anyone “with a weak heart” should go but seemingly forgets that he’s the one giving both the warning and the announcement.

The gut-busting moment when he turns around to leave is interrupted by Leela just in time to remind the Professor to focus. It’s an underrated but totally hilarious line that reminds fans of the Professor’s age.

“You Raised My Hopes And Dashed Them Quite Expertly, Sir. Bravo!”

Tinny Tim in Futurama

Futurama season 4, episode 6, “Bender Should Not Be Allowed On Television” sees one of the cast members on the fictional soap opera All My Circuits malfunction, leading to an open casting call for child actors. Bender makes Tinny Tim, a young orphan robot, believe that he could have a shot at the role, only for Tim to realize that Bender is actually auditioning. After Tinny Tim realizes that Bender has no intention of helping him, he says “You raised my hopes and dashed them quite expertly, sir. Bravo!” This is hilarious in comments, but the quote is also frequently used on social media sites to a hilarious effect.

Bender Bending Rodríguez’s Famous Catchphrase

“Bite My Shiny Metal A—!”

Bender looking angry in Futurama.

Most fans would agree that the best Bender quote is the one where he tells others to bite him as a way to insult them. It has become an iconic catchphrase in the fandom and has been featured in several memes and even fan art about the show.

The abrasiveness of the line is part of what makes it so funny, as it perfectly captures Bender’s personality in a way that not a lot of his other quotes do. Viewers know whoever is at the receiving end of the mean phrase is going to be in trouble, especially if it’s Fry.

Turanga Leela Has To Be Honest

“At The Risk Of Sounding Negative, No.”

Leela looking angry in Futurama.

One of the best things about Leela is that she’s not afraid to speak her mind, no matter who she’s talking to. When Fry does something particularly questionable about supplies for a challenging delivery, she’s quick to rebut and tells him that no, they’re not ready to leave.

Her sarcastic attempt at being polite is not surprising for her character, as it is part of what makes her so fun to watch. She’s obviously annoyed by everyone’s incompetence but can’t stand to leave her colleagues and closest friends.

Related: 10 Unpopular Opinions About The Futurama Revival

Professor Farnsworth’s Nihilism Creates One Of Futurama’s Most Iconic Lines

“I Don’t Want To Live On This Planet Anymore.”

Farnsworth and the Homo Farnsworth

Futurama season 7, episode 9, “A Clockwork Origin” is actually an episode centered on Professor Farnsworth, with it chronicling his attempts to prove the theory of evolution while on a planet consisting entirely of robots. In the episode, Professor Farnsworth discovers a new species that he believes could be the missing link, with him naming the fossil Homo farnsworth. However, upon presenting his discovery to the scientific community, including the creationist orangutan Dr. Banjo, the creations explain that Farnsworth’s finding actually disproves evolution. Farnsworth then sighs and mutters “I don’t want to live on this planet anymore,” a line that has been frequently quoted in the years since season 7.

Philip J. Fry Starts A Meme

“Shut Up And Take My Money!”

Fry waving cash angrily in Futurama.

All the “eyePhone” ads have gotten to Fry’s gullible head and he’s obsessed with the idea of owning one for himself. A hilarious moment ensues when he talks to an obviously bored store clerk about it, eagerly asking if they still have any left in stock. The visual gag could have been the best part of the scene, as the clerk reaches behind a curtain and says there may still be one somewhere, only to reveal a giant factory-like setup creating hundreds of phones.

Fry’s frantic reaction to the “last” one left is somehow even funnier, though, and it has become an Internet staple. The meme has been used throughout the years in the same way Fry says the quote, as a critique of consumerist habits and capitalistic greed – or, more often than not, just as a hilarious way to say that something is a must-have product. Due to its meme potential and iconic status, this line is arguably the best and funniest quote from Futurama.



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